


Love, Eternal

by primuladolor



Category: Boy Meets World, Girl Meets World
Genre: Angst, Babies, Comedy, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hacking, Kisses, Love, Multi, Music, New York, Peanut Butter, Philadelphia, Tags, The Apartment, idk what to tag this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-13
Updated: 2017-04-15
Packaged: 2018-10-18 12:41:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,907
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10617144
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/primuladolor/pseuds/primuladolor
Summary: In which life takes a turn for the worse, then the better, and everybody gets a happy ending. Especially Shawn and Angela.





	1. Pressure

"Shawn."

" _Talk_   _to me,_ Shawn."

"I can't do this, Katy. I'm sorry. I just can't do it anymore." he said.

Shawn twisted the gold band around and off his fourth finger and dropped it onto the coffee table, right in the center of a faded ring of coffee, from the underside of a mug.

He could hear Katy's cries behind him as he turned and left the house.

Shawn carried on moving. He could hear the low buzz in his pocket. Katy was calling him. He turned off his phone. He didn't know where he was going, all he knew was that his feet were moving and they were taking him somewhere. They stopped next to a payphone, and before Shawn could register what was going on, he was slotting quarters into the hole, and pressing buttons. Dialling a number.

"Hello?"

"I need your help. It's been forever, I know. I should've called. Why didn't I _call?_ "

"Hey, _Shawnie?_ Is that you? Shawn?"

"Jack. I need your help. I need your advice. I need- I need my brother right now."

"We have a lot of things to talk about, Shawn. A lot. It's been months. You couldn't visit? Couldn't even _call?_  Not once?"

"Jack, please. I'll explain, I swear. It's been crazy. Just come visit me. I'll text you the details. Soon."

He put the phone back on the receiver, slumping his head on the cold metal surface.

He didn't notice that there were tears streaming down his face, cutting into the payphone's grime. His lips were chapped and his head felt heavy. He closed his eyes.

He had lots of things to explain. Not just to Jack. There was Maya. There was Cory and Topanga. There was Riley. Feeny. _Christ._ All the people Shawn had disappointed. All the people who had worked so hard for him and Katy to be together. In a way, that was the problem.

He couldn't help feeling a little relief though. Maya too. But Shawn just couldn't take it anymore. Maya was a good kid, but being a stepfather to her wasn't what Shawn had anticipated. Shawn had realised a long time ago, that he and Maya were not daddy-daughter material. And that was okay. He felt more like a Mr Turner to her anyway. But if Shawn was honest, marrying Katy was a mistake. She was a great person, but Shawn didn't love her. He just felt like he was supposed to.

Wasn't that funny? He'd said that exact same thing about _Angela_ last year, swallowing his true feelings and pretending she was nothing to him. Stupid, stupid, stupid. He remembered when Angela had come to see him in Topanga's. She looked just the same as she always did, but blonde. There was so much blonde lately, enough to last Shawn a lifetime. He'd never been much of a blonde fan. He remembered touching Angela after all that time. _Thirteen years_. And yet, she was virtually unchanged. She still smelled like cinnamon. She still bit her nails. She still had that same crooked smile. She was still perfect. Shawn had himself convinced she was back for him, he'd dreamt about this day for thirteen years. And it all came crashing down around him, smashing stars and crushing his dreams.

**Wham! Married.**

**Wham! _Kids._**

He'd always wanted kids with Angela. Tiny brown babies with big smiles and bright eyes and wanderlust. And now she would have them with someone else. A nameless, faceless, military man. Not Shawn. _Him_.

He shook his head, snapping out of that daze. It hurt too much to think of Angela.

It was time to find a place to stay. He couldn't stay with Cory and Topanga. He didn't feel like dealing with them right now. He scanned the block for accommodations. 

**_The Rosewell Motel._ **

It sounded like a place to go to lick your wounds. And Shawn had a lot of licking to do.

 


	2. Hourly Rate

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shawn gets a very important visit.

The man behind the reception desk eyed Shawn up suspiciously. Shawn stiffened. He'd slapped a wad of the bills onto the hard wood surface and muttered a statement about the duration of his time here being "indeterminate". The man at the counter was probably unaware of how to spell that, and handed Shawn a key to room 93. Shawn examined his surroundings, and grimly regarded the peeling wallpaper and stained rugs. This was the kind of place Angela would have called tacky. And he supposed it was.

He shuffled along the the hallway, unlocking the door and then closing it firmly behind him. He realized he hadn't brought any clothes or any of his belongings. Hell, he hadn't even brought a jacket. But he could worry about that later. All he wanted to do now was sleep. He needed to rest his weary bones and get away from all this for a while. He padded over to the double bed in the middle of the room, and edged into it, wrapping the blankets around himself. It didn't bother him that he was still wearing his jeans. Still wearing his shoes. He was warm and he was safe. The rain outside the window felt like a distant dream and Shawn was oblivious to all of it.

He dreamt of Angela. He remembered Angela. He dreamt of how Angela had looked that Christmas back in '98. When they kissed under the mistletoe. He remembered about how her face looked when he'd brought her a cup off eggnog. When Morgan gave her a gingerbread cookie. When Amy told her how pretty she looked. He remembered about how Angela's face looked when she told him that she loved Christmas. 

Shawn loved Christmas with Angela.

He woke up to the sound of rapping on his door. Groggy and disoriented, he stumbled over to the door and pulled it open. His hair was dishevelled and his mouth was dry. 

"Cory?"

"Shawn. What is going on?" Cory's mouth was twisted into a frown, and his eyebrows were furrowed.

"It's a long story." Shawn's voice was croaky. He pulled his lower lip between his teeth.

"You've got time."

Shawn turned on the lights, he and Cory wincing in unison, when they harshly lit the room. He sat on the poorly stuffed armchair in front of the TV, idly fingering the clicker. Cory sat on the futon opposite, waiting.

It took Shawn a second to get the words out, but when they came, it was like a dam had broken.

"I don't love Katy. I've never loved Katy. I-I love Angela. I want Angela. I wanted what you and Topanga have and I thought Katy could give me that and I was wrong, Cory. I was wrong. I'm sorry, but I can't do this anymore."

"Oh, Shawn. How long has this been going on for? How long have you felt this way?"

"The dreams started about six months ago." Shawn licked his chapped lips and ran a hand through his hair.

"Dreams?" Cory leaned forward.

" _About Angela_. I'd dream that we were walking in the park, or that we were getting ice cream. I would dream about her laying on the beach. In the last dream, we got married. I can't stop thinking about her. I love her, Cor."

Shawn couldn't read Cory's face for a second. But then something odd happened. Cory was smiling!

"You still love Angela!"

"But- but. I thought you were angry! I thought-I thought-"

"I am angry. But I'm also overjoyed. Look, Shawn, there's something I have to tell you. Angela got divorced two weeks ago. And she called Topanga and I. She was a wreck. And then we told her you got married. And she was even more of a wreck! She still loves you _too_! " It was impossible not to hear the glee in Cory's voice.

"She is-? Oh! But what about all that stuff you said about me and Katy? And how you acted like Angela meant nothing to me and you and Topanga? And how you- you-" Shawn was flabbergasted.

"Shawn. Topanga and I did that to try and make things easier for you! But I can see now it was a huge mistake. But I thought things were going great for you and Katy. What happened?" Cory was looking somber now.

Shawn sighed. "I've already told you the grunt of it. But she's getting cosy with Maya's dad. I've seen the texts, Cory. It's the kind of stuff people say is harmless, but always develops into something more."

Cory couldn't really argue much. He'd been there with Topanga. And now look at them.

Shawn suddenly jolted, and Cory's eyes widened. "Hold on a second. You said Angela called you. You and Topanga spoke to her."

"Yeah?"

"How would Angela know your phone number? Have you been keeping in contact with her? All these years?!"

Cory flushed a brilliant shade of red.

"Shawn, look, I can explain-"

"Explain what? The fact that you've been keeping in contact with the _love of my life_ and you didn't tell me? What the _hell_? "

Cory stood up, approaching Shawn. His hands were in a position of someone ready to mediate. 

"Get out, Cory! Leave! How could you? How could you-"

Shawn broke into a fresh flood of tears, and Cory knew Shawn would definitely not want anyone around while he was crying, so he exited hastily. He would come back tomorrow, when Shawn had calmed down.

 

 


	3. All The World's A Stage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shawn needs to get his affairs in order.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man.  
> \- William Shakespeare

He looked like shit.

Shawn Hunter had never been vain, but he was confident enough to know he was attractive. And he was smart enough to know that in this moment he was the most pathetic looking he'd ever been. His eyes were red and squinted, he had dried tears on his cheeks and chin, and his face was flushed with the effort of trying to keep the tears back. It had been 9 hours and he was barely coping.

Cory had left when Shawn told him to. Shawn couldn't let anyone see him cry, and if he was honest, Cory probably felt awkward about Shawn crying. He was a 36 year old man for Pete's sake, and he was bawling like a baby. His stomach growled, distracting him from his internal monologue, and he realized he hadn't eaten since last night. He briefly considered going out for pizza, but decided against it. He couldn't risk anyone seeing him and asking questions. He couldn't face anyone.

He padded out of the bathroom, suddenly shivering. The heating was broken, and he didn't want to complain about it to the man at the reception desk.

Wandering over the "kitchen", which was really just a mini fridge and a microwave on a counter, he yanked open the mini fridge, half-expecting it to be empty. Upon inspection, the contents boasted a Tupperware container of decaying pork, a shrivelled stick of celery, and a half empty jar of peanut butter. He reached for the peanut butter, not even looking at the rancid pork or the withered celery. He couldn't eat peanut butter alone. 

He pulled open the cupboards, which were, for the most part, bare, finding only a packet of Oreos and a single, solitary Dorito in the crevice of the cupboard. Oreos and peanut butter. A familiar treat from his college days, Angela adored the unusual combination, and had gotten Cory and Topanga hooked, whereas Shawn vowed never to try them, staying safe in the confines of what was normal.

Shawn ripped the packet of cookies open and dug his finger into the peanut butter jar, smearing the creamy substance over a cookie. He tentatively raised the cookie to his mouth, and took the first bite. It was shockingly delicious and he understood why his friends had been so enamoured with it.  

After he'd demolished the entire packet, and probably drained the motel's water supply, he felt refreshed and level headed. He felt ready to communicate. He was still angry with Cory, Topanga too, but he ought to give them a chance to explain themselves. But there was someone else he needed to explain  _himself_ to first.

_Ring ring._

"Shawn? Oh Shawn, thank God you're safe. I was so worried!"

"Katy."

"Shawn. We need to talk."

"I know. Can you come over? I'm at the Rosewell Motel, on Tenth Avenue. Room 93. Come alone. And Katy?"

"Yes, Shawn?"

"I'm sorry. For everything."

He hung up.

15 minutes later, there was a knock on the door. Shawn exhaled, gripping the doorknob. Katy was standing on the other side, her bottom lip between her teeth, like a child. He realized just much she looked like Maya.

"Come in, Katy. Do you want a coffee or anything?"

"No. But thanks. Thank you." She traipsed over to the futon and eased herself down onto it.

He sighed. "Look Katy, I want to explain myself. You didn't deserve to be treated the way I treated you this morning.'

She crossed her arms over her hoodie clad chest. His wife. "No, I didn't."

"The thing is Katy...I don't think this is working out."

There was a moment of silence. Shawn held his breath.

"Me neither. Shawn, I like you. You are great and I adore the way you look out for Maya. But, truthfully, I think marriage was a bad decision. It's crazy, isn't it? We talk for a few months, then boom, marriage! Although there was a lot of pressure on us. We both rushed into it, honestly." Katy gave a shy smile.

"And if I'm honest, I think Maya was so caught up in the idea of having a father figure, she didn't realize that maybe the situation wasn't ideal." Shawn rubbed the end of his cotton T-shirt in between his fingertips.

"I was meaning to talk to you about that, actually. Kermit wants joint custody. He's very apologetic about Maya and the divorce, about everything." A flicker of hope flashed across her face, just for a second, but Shawn caught it. He gave a genuine smile, reaching out to pat Katy's arm. "Tell me more."

They talked like that for a good half hour. Shawn told Katy about his Angela dreams, Katy told Shawn about her reemerging feelings for Kermit. They shared secrets and exchanged hopes, and cried and laughed. Katy smiled.

"Divorce?" she proposed amicably, sipping from her glass of water.

Shawn chuckled. Without the proper context, they looked like psychos. "Divorce." he agreed quietly.

"Friends?" Katy asked nervously.

"You know it." Shawn eagerly affirmed.

"What about Maya?" Katy looked nervous yet again, and for good reason. Maya hadn't noticed the problems between Katy and Shawn, and had been living in blissful ignorance, happy as Larry. Shawn exhaled through his nostrils, thinking.

"We have to tell her obviously. And I'll have to arrange times when she can see me. Maybe once I've found a place to stay."

"You can stay with us as long as you need, Shawn."

"That'll be awkward and confusing for Maya. No, I've got Jack coming down soon. He'll sort something out. He's good at that."

Katy left 10 minutes later and Shawn agreed to visit tomorrow,to explain, once Maya came back from her friend Audrey's house.

He took his phone from his jean pocket and shot a text to Jack, telling him the motel address.

 

***

 

"Oh, Cory." Topanga sighed, massaging Cory's shoulders while he buried his face in his palms. Shawn had just texted them explaining what happened with Katy. He had also said he was willing to talk, but he was still angry and upset. Cory had explained the events that had occurred after he found Shawn at the motel and how angry Shawn was with he and Topanga. Topanga was certain that Shawn would understand the situation once they had expressed the reason for their actions. She felt guilty and upset, both for pressuring Shawn and Katy into a _marriage_ and demonizing and erasing Angela, her best friend, even for Shawn's sake. Doubtless Cory was feeling the same. They sighed simultaneously, Topanga putting her hands in her lap.

"Mom? Daddy?'

Cory and Topanga looked up to see Riley standing a few feet away in her bunny pajamas, a concerned look on her usually cheerful face. "What's going on?" she asked, in a manner identical to Cory. She rubbed her eyes sleepily.

Cory sighed. Riley probably wouldn't take this well, being so close to Maya. 

"Shawn and Katy are... splitting up."

" _What_ _?_ But what about Maya? Shawn is supposed to be Maya's new dad! I don't- I-"

"Riley, snookums, sometimes in life, things work out different than what we wanted. Shawn and Katy feel that they made the wrong decision with the marriage thing, and have decided to stay friends. Maya can still see Shawn, he doesn't have to be married to her mom, or try to "be her dad". Kind of like Mr Turner was a positive role model for Shawn when he was you and Maya's age." Topanga reasoned.

"But Maya will be so upset!" Riley's eyes were wide and her big smile was replaced with a sad pout.

"Honey, Maya's real dad wants to see her. Shawn says he wants joint custody. Maya doesn't need Shawn to be her dad." Cory said calmly.

Riley's mouth dropped open in shock, and then quickly turned into a grin. "That's great! So why do you two look so upset?"

Cory and Topanga looked at each other.

"That's a long complicated story."

"I'm staying up to hear it."

 

 

 

 


End file.
